Legal Commentary

Not so long ago, David Zaring directed us to an article suggesting that having daughters tends to make judges more liberal on gender issues.  As a parent of three daughters ? aged 10, 8, and 8 ? let me also hypothesize that it might tend to make one more conservative on First Amendment issues.  A little introspective psychology after the jump.

One thing that having kids has sensitized me to is the coarseness of much of our national conversation.  It?s not that I?m especially prudish.  I?m fluent in the language of sailors, and it generally takes some doing to offend me.  I fully recognize that this is the world my daughters will have to live in, and that it is important that they be prepared for it rather than walled off from it.  (I should also note that I sincerely hope that my reactions would be the same were I to have three sons instead of three daughters.)

We watch very little TV in our house, but for the last couple of years my oldest daughter has been very interested in football (to the point where she?s been more interested in watching it than I have).  There are, of course, all sorts of reasons not to care for much of the advertising that accompanies NFL broadcasts.  But I really, especially could do without the Viagra ads.

And then there?s popular music.  For a while, I felt like I was holding my own in the war against the pop industry.  My iPod still has the playlist we listened to (at their request) whenever I?d drive my daughters somewhere, which featured a pretty nice assortment of appropriate Americana/folk-type songs.  All it took to undermine my efforts, it turns out, is a friend with a sister in middle school.  And now the request is for Top 40 radio.

So what?s the big deal?  Well, here is the Billboard Top 10 from 1978, when I was 10:

01. Shadow Dancing » Andy Gibb

02. Night Fever » Bee Gees

03. You Light Up My Life » Debby Boone

04. Stayin' Alive » Bee Gees

05. Kiss You All Over » Exile

06. How Deep Is Your Love » Bee Gees

07. Baby Come Back » Player

08. (Love Is) Thicker Than Water » Andy Gibb

09. Boogie Oogie Oogie » A Taste Of Honey

10. Three Times A Lady » Commodores

To a ten-year-old ear, sustained listening to these songs would likely create the impression that the really, really important thing is dancing.  The Exile tune, which I don?t remember ever having heard before I tracked it down online today, is considerably more adult-themed, but also seems likely to strike the ten-year-old ear as boring.  And while I understand that maybe some of the dancing referred to is, you know, metaphorical, any of that shot way over my ten-year-old head. 

Here, for comparison purposes, is the current Billboard Top 10: 

1. Tonight (I?m Lovin? You) ? Enrique Iglesias
2. Grenade ? Bruno Mars
3. F**kin? Perfect ? Pink
4. Hold It Against Me ? Britney Spears
5. Born This Way ? Lady Gaga
6. Firework ? Katy Perry
7. F**k You (Forget You) ? Cee Lo Green
8. Rocketeer ? Far East Movement
9. Hey Baby (Drop It To The Floor) ? Pitbull
10. Yeah 3X ? Chris Brown

The bottom half of the top 20 includes Avril Lavigne?s ?What the Hell,? Rihanna?s ?S&M,? and two tunes by Ke$ha, who?s not really my top choice for a role model. 

A quick skim of the lyrics to these songs reveals that dancing (often less-subtly metaphorical) remains a high priority for the youth of America.  But still, if I may, WTF?  Would it kill us to draw a line somewhere short of F-bombs in the titles of the Top 40?  (All manner of questions getting begged in that sentence, I realize.)  Their presence makes my screening job easier, sure, but my daughters can also read and turn out to be curious about what it is, precisely, that F.U. stands for, which is not really a conversation I expected to be having this early in their lives.  I don?t mean to dissuade any kids from coming onto my lawn or anything, but maybe this is a handbasket and is that some sort of flame-filled region we seem to be headed toward?

As the recent blogospheric discussions of Tiger Mommery seem mostly to conclude with respect to parenting generally, one does one?s best in the face of all of this.  I listened to my share of garbage as a kid, and that very same iPod contains bad words aplenty and lots of music that I expect my kids will enjoy later in life even though they are not ready for it now.  The FCC appears not to have my back, and so the discussion of what F.U. stands for will have to take place, whether I am ready for it or not.  Even so, from where I sit it?s quite tempting these days to wonder where Tipper Gore is when you need her.