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Law Humor

: Bernard Madoff

Crawl Backs..What MY lawyer says..

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Lawyers are like a--holes. Everyone's got one. And mazel tov to my friends at Milberg! Mel Weiss would be proud that you're stepping up to the plaintiff plate. If what half the lawyers I keep reading about are suggesting, that Middle Eastern group that put the $500 million in last year are going to have to put pack at least the profits that they earned from me.

OK, they were only in for a short time, and the profits didn't add up to more than $50 mil or so, but the point is, whatever your lawyer is saying, my lawyers are saying that the 'clawbacks' that everybody is talking about will be limited to the profits that were paid out, not the principal that was returned.

But before everyone starts feeding at the trough and talking about their wild "losses", the losses everyone can realistically claim are limited to the principal amount that you put in with me. Those that crawled back to keep all of the accrued profits in their accounts can't claim those monies as "lost".

But my auditor David Friehling, a very accomplished accountant will sign off on the fact that you can file amended tax returns going back three years, and the IRS will be refunding the taxes that you paid on the profits that you reported.

And, yes, I read about Thierry this morning. A terrible tragedy. If I say more about the topic, people will misunderstand my intentions.

Full post as published by Bernard Madoff on December 23, 2008 (boomark / email).

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