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: Bernard Madoff

Girls Do Lunch

To: Shana

From: Aunt Ruth

Darling Girl,

How I have longed to hear from you during this terrible period we all have been through.

You know you were always my spiritual " daughter" more than my niece.

My daughters-in-law ( well only the one now,) were never exactly, you know, my type.

But, as you so intelligently pointed out, " The Times they are a'changing."

I have some thoughts on the Consignment Thing. We still need to be under the radar until Bernie goes to his new club.

In a way, clothes from us would be worth OODLES more than just any woman's clothes who used to be rich. ( NO, dear, i do not have very much money. i do not know why people think i do. So if you were thinking of a loan, I'm afraid Auntie Ruthie must say "NON, Jem'excuse")

Also sweet heart, I don't think Mr Picard would give us his list with current addresses, but they are in the paper, and Nan made a back up disk for me months ago.

However, have you considered that these ladies might not be totally thrilled to hear from us?

So we need to have a "middle woman" just like a" female feeder." We can offer her a few thou up front and a teeny percentage of the take.

She'll jump at it, I bet.

And, someone from Walter's family to contact the gentile women in Greenwich. It will be just like the old days.. people will be banging down the doors to get in! Ha!

Maybe Bernie's sister Sonny?? Does she not look like someone that put his face on a woman's body - it's frightening. but she is poor.

Maybe she would front for us?

So, yes, Shana Madele, let's do lunch - I'm thinking we should go to the Lobster Roll on Montauk Hwy. I'll be coming out after I visit your Uncle today, or tomorrow morning.

If you want to meet next week, how about an out of the way Chinese Place on the Upper West Side? Everyone knows that we take out from Pig Heaven, so there's no need to have some idiot from the NY Post waiting to trounce on us.

You can have steamed veggies and no sauce and I can have moo shu pork, because , apparently, the kosher thing didn't' do much for us on the " God is on our side": business and I always ate pork OUT anyway.

And egg rolls and hot and sour.. ohh, I can't wait!

YUMMO to quote that silly Rachel Ray girl.

Hunan Gardens. 96th street.. what day?..I"m Pretty fucking free.

Love you, kisses,

Auntie RAM

Full post as published by Bernard Madoff on June 12, 2009 (boomark / email).