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Law Humor

: Lowering the Bar

Yet Another Reason Not to Wrestle Your Snake in the Parking Lot

By Kevin Underhill

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The Associated Press reports that "[t]wo men were arrested after bewildered diners at a McDonald's spotted them wrestling a 5-foot (1.5 meter) python named Boris in the restaurant parking lot, police [in Melbourne] said Thursday."

I don't think the diners knew at the time he was named "Boris," but I suppose this python might be at least locally famous.

Police said the two men had stolen Boris and an unidentified lizard from a local pet shop on Wednesday. That was the reason for the arrest - to my knowledge it is not illegal to wrestle a snake anywhere in the world, and it seems least likely to be illegal in Australia.  At some point after the theft, the men entered the McDonald's parking lot with the snake, "where they began wrestling with it in front of puzzled customers."  Rather than express appreciation for the free carnival show, someone called police.

"In all honesty," said Detective Sgt. Andrew Beams, "it's just a case of dumb and dumber.  Anyone who gets out there with a one-and-a-half meter python in a McDonald's car park - they're pretty dumb."  Well, if it's a stolen python, yes.

The men were charged with burglary, and Boris was returned to his owner at the "Totally Reptiles" pet shop.  Jodie Graham described Boris as "cold and stressed," but unharmed.

The lizard remains at large.

Full post as published by Lowering the Bar on September 10, 2010 (boomark / email).

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