Miscellaneous

Playoffs? Don't talk about ... playoffs?

Posted on January 07, 2009
The NFL playoffs are full steam ahead. And while some of us (me) are happy to see our teams (E-A-G-L-E-S Eagles!) still in the hunt, others of us (Dustin) aren't so lucky (smell you later, Colts). At the moment, the...

Another Sad Hoarding Story

Posted on January 07, 2009
A few months ago, I posted about a 73-year-old man in England who had hoarded over 100 tons of trash in his home and the city was called in to clean up his place. Now, a 74-year-old man in...

HaHaHa! Who's Laughing Now, Dumbass?

Posted on January 07, 2009
You ever wonder what might happen if you actually did make that bomb joke rattling around your head every time you enter an airport. Ask this guy: A St. Louis man finds out the hard way that jokes about shoe...

The (Kinda-Sorta) Daily Memo - 1/7/09

Posted on January 07, 2009
The billable hour may never go away, and it's all Herm Edwards' fault. (Above the Law) Well that sure didn't take long - Norm Coleman's taking Al Franken's Senate victory to court. (Law.com) For my money, until the law bans...

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Obama Loves Peach Cobbler. Communists Love Peach Cobbler. Coincidence?

Posted on January 06, 2009
I think not. Seven years ago, Barry appeared on a restaurant review show and so dominated the conversation that the producers decided not to air it. Conspiracy?...

Worst Roommate Ever?

Posted on January 06, 2009
I once found a roommate online -- nice guy. Was never home on weekends. Liked gay porn a little much for my taste -- mostly because he looked at it on the desktop, in the living room -- but otherwise,...

QuizLaw's Future Lawsuit of the Day

Posted on January 06, 2009
(Image via The Smoking Gun; H/T branded)...

Well there are ten thousand spoons, but where's my knife?!

Posted on January 06, 2009
Last month, a gal in Nevada was busted for a DUI. Lady was pulled over, and while she said she had only had one margarita, she failed her field sobriety test and blew above a 0.08 on the ol' too-much-booze-in-blood...

My new favorite Senator!

Posted on January 06, 2009
By 225 votes, Minnesota is Al Franken's. Hot diggity. Of course, Norm Coleman isn't taking the election certification sitting down, as he's planning a full-own legal onslaught. (Hat tip to If a TV Falls in the Woods for the video...

Today in Dead Cat News

Posted on January 05, 2009
In furtherance of my New Year's resolution to write as often as possible about meaningless news stories, here's a doozy of a worthless story: The first family leaving the White House this month will be without one of its longtime...

Show Me Your Nuts

Posted on January 05, 2009
Man, how bad is the recession? Even the squirrels are getting screwed: An acorn shortage in Indiana's woodlands has cut into squirrels' chief food source and given hunters more chances to bag some of the furry rodents. Biologists aren't...

Greta's Hansel Arrested in New Year's Robbery

Posted on January 05, 2009
This guy apparently has bread crumb dyslexia. A messy thief was arrested after a trail of popcorn kernels led police from a burglarized store to the suspect's living room. California Police say a Food Stop store was robbed early New...

The (Kinda-Sorta) Daily Memo - 1/2/09

Posted on January 02, 2009
What does Ben Roethlisberger have to do with the fact that the U.S. News and World Report law school rankings are kinda fucked up? (Law.com) Hey, remember that pinball machine from What Women Want? Yeah, neither does anyone else, which...

Oh Charles, you're supposed to get crazy DUIs after you become a politician, not before

Posted on January 02, 2009
Earlier this week, Charles Barkley was arrested for a DUI. And although a drunk Barkley driving around with a gun in the car is rather terrifying, there are some amusing pieces to the story According to the officer who wrote...

This is like something out of a Penthouse letter...

Posted on December 31, 2008
Dear Penthouse, So I'm sitting at home alone when a chick walks into my house. She opened a sliding door in the back and just quietly crept in. I was minding my own business when she walked in and up...

This gal is a peach

Posted on December 31, 2008
Ladies and gentlemen, I present Britain's Jane Hofmann: When a wealthy businessman's wife got lost in her Mercedes on the way to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, she did not stop to ask for directions. Instead she stopped at a supermarket,...

Silly couple, it's "sleeps with the fishes"

Posted on December 30, 2008
A couple in Ohio got in some trouble when county officials found that they had a rather unsanitary home. Which certainly wasn't helped any by the 124 cats. Seventy-one of which were dead. Most of which were wrapped in newspapers...

Cruel pigs!

Posted on December 30, 2008
Daniel Osborne just wanted to see his mother for Christmas. But she lives in Washington, and he was in Salt Lake City. What's a guy to do, when he has no money for a plane, train or automobile? Well Osborne...

The (Kinda-Sorta) Daily Memo - 12/29/08

Posted on December 29, 2008
Hey, did you guys know some crazy broad cured cancer? (Above the Law) Congrats to Sean Hannity, 2008's Misinformer of the Year. (Media Matters). Have you seen what's going to be included in the W Library? (Concurring Opinions) Rumey and...

Monday Morning Interrogation Theater

Posted on December 29, 2008
We open on a police precinct in Boulder, Colorado. Specifically, we open in a suspect interrogation room, where we find Officer Kevin Granberg and two 17-year-old boys. We shall call them Acne and Backne. Officer Granberg: Do you boys know...

Overreact much?

Posted on December 29, 2008
Last week, Dustin complained about parents who bring their screaming babies to the movies. Well a fella from my hometown feels your pain, Dustin, as Philadelphian (EAGLES!) James Joseph Ciaelell is now facing six charges, including aggravated assault and attempted...

Well they don't look fucking jolly at all!

Posted on December 24, 2008
In a dangerous midnight raid, a joint task force made up of agents from the CIA, the FBI, the NSA, the IRS, the FDA, PETA, the AARP and WKRP in Cincinnati stormed the lone house sitting on the vast snowscape,...

Why Does this Man Want to Kill the Internet?

Posted on December 23, 2008
A state lawmaker in Idaho, whose head is full of shiny, clinky rocks, has come up with worst idea ever: State Rep. Steve Hartgen, a former newspaper publisher, says he might introduce a bill to force people to use their...

Dude: At Least Let Her Finish the Job before Calling the Cops

Posted on December 23, 2008
"Police arrested a married couple Sunday after a dispute over a haircut. Jaycee Houston, 34, told police that his wife, 29-year-old Angela Houston, cut off some of his hair during an argument at their Mount Healthy home. Authorities charged...

That's the Way the Cookie Cru ... What? He's Gonna Slash Their Wrists?

Posted on December 23, 2008
I appreciate a man who takes pride in his job, but maybe this guy is a little too serious about his job. A Texas school bus driver has been arrested after allegedly brandishing a knife and threatening three sixth-graders for...

Why Does Saving the Environment Have to Be So Disgusting?

Posted on December 23, 2008
A plastic surgeon out in L.A. has found an interesting alternative to unleaded fuel. Human fat! Liposuctioning unwanted blubber out of pampered Los Angelenos may not seem like a dream job, but it has its perks. Free fuel is one...

That's dedication!

Posted on December 22, 2008
This one law professor in Michigan, he apparently thinks all the hypotheticals that law profs use are bullshit. Why give the students hypothetical problems to discuss when you can give them the real deal: A law student and the professor...

Stupid is As the Pervert Does

Posted on December 19, 2008
Hey! When you're trying to tape the ladies taking a wee, you might want to avoid capturing yourself on camera. A video camera was found in the women's bathroom of a Buffalo Grove business Wednesday afternoon, but no footage was...

Gotcha Journalism is Back

Posted on December 19, 2008
Hey! Did y'all hear that Bristol Palin -- Sarah Palin's knocked-up daughter-- is expected to have her child on Saturday? Looks like Grandma Johnston -- the father's mother -- may not be able to make it. A 42-year-old Wasilla woman...

How Many Prostitutes Look 12-Years-Old and Scream, 'Daddy, Daddy'?

Posted on December 19, 2008
This story, out of Texas, comes again from QuizLaw confidential informant, Joyce: It was a little before 8 at night when the breaker went out at Emily Milburn's home in Galveston. She was busy preparing her children for school the...

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