Florida

SFL Friday -- Go Go Aqua Girl!

Posted on May 14, 2010
Well it's a bit of slow day around here, legal news wise.If you're interested, the Florida Supreme Court ruled yesterday that they're pretty much the only ones who can determine what constitutes the unauthorized practice of law.Then I see that Dexter Lehtinen will no longer be handling at least some major Miccosukee Tribe stuff, which will now be solely the responsibility of Sonia O'Donnell, a quality lawyer who works at my friend Frank Burt's shop...

"We Seemed To Float Right Through the Air"

Posted on May 14, 2010
I've had this song stuck in my head the last few days (here in a beautiful arrangement set to the classic dance scene from Picnic), and it's impossible to not feel hopeful, romantic, and wildly optimistic listening to it.Perhaps that's why I get such a kick from this story:When asked to predict the outcome of civil and criminal cases, lawyers are often too optimistic...

Long Distance Citrus Canker Runaround -- Yours Is No Disgrace?

Posted on May 13, 2010
Given that we just saw the State blow $120k on dubious "expert" anti-gay adoption testimony, I don't want to overstate anything.But is it too much to suggest that the State's furious scorched earth litigation strategy in defending the citrus canker lawsuits -- paying Adorno & Yoss hundreds of thousands of dollars (millions?) to force Bobby Gilbert to try multiple suits in different forums for the last six years -- ranks up there with one of the more colossally stupid wastes of taxpayer money in recent memory?I guess I say that given the canker eradication program they have spent so much money vigorously defending at taxpayer expense -- a program that radically changed the landscape of South Florida -- was such a wanker in the first place...

Gerald Posner Hires Mark Lane To Write Odd Demand Letter.

Posted on May 13, 2010
As the New Times reports, Gerald Posner has hired Rush to Judgment author Mark Lane to write a slightly oddball letter regarding allegations of plagiarism that have been lodged against the famous author.Aside from the gimmicky (self-promoting?) JFK connection, here's the key graf on the possible legal claims:"Most egregious was the email letter dated May 5, 2010, from Tim Elfrink, your staff writer for Miami New Times to Mr...

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Bill McCollum's Good Judgment

Posted on May 12, 2010
I love how lawyers always double down, rather than just confess error and move on.When you have a lawyer who is also a politician, that tendency is multiplied by the number of 'long stroke' massages one can obtain by a Rentboy in the world's most totally gay continent (Europe):Attorney General Bill McCollum Tuesday defended his personal intervention into the selection of an antigay expert witness in the case defending the state's gay adoption ban, saying his office "searched a long time" for someone and that George Rekers was the only one of two they could find...

3d DCA Watch -- No Exit (With Palm Trees).

Posted on May 12, 2010
I was talking to a prominent appellate lawyer the other day, when all of sudden the conversation took an odd turn... Can I confess something? I tell you this as an artist, I think you'll understand. Sometimes when I'm driving... on the road at night...

Expect No Mercy.

Posted on May 11, 2010
Does anyone have a handle on how much oil is flooding the Gulf right now?I scoured the Herald articles today and they seem to be adopting uncritically the "official" 5000 barrels estimate, which equates to 210,000 gallons a day. (This means we will have surpassed the Exxon Valdez spill by mid-June if left unchecked...

Dwyane Wade Cites Iqbal!

Posted on May 11, 2010
Hey, two of my favorite things, together again:First, Plaintiff again fails to plead sufficient facts to clear the pleading hurdle set forth by the Supreme Court in Ascroft v. Iqbal, 129 S. Ct. 1937 (2009) and Bell Atl. Corp. v. Twombly, 550 U.S. 544 (2007)...

Judge Hoeveler Shows Mercy on Belly Dancing CyberSquatter.

Posted on May 10, 2010
What?Hey, I think the headline's accurate.The Judge awarded a default judgment to Taverna Opa, which suffered the misfortune of having a former belly dancer leave the restaurant, register its domain, and then post information on the site for another Greek restaurant...

Kagan! (Yawn)

Posted on May 10, 2010
I hope everyone had a nice Mother's Day and pampered that special someone this weekend (no, I don't mean yourself).So, Kagan.Not surprisingly (to swlip, at least) I share Greenwald's concerns, but that's just the way Obama is. Steadfast compromise for no apparent gain seems to be his M...

SFL Friday -- And the Pulitzer Goes To.....

Posted on May 07, 2010
Can you imagine all the good karma a practice like this generates:In December, a Staten Island judge said debt collectors seemed to think their lawsuits were taking place in a legal Land of Oz, where everyone was supposed to follow anticonsumer rules invented by some unseen debt-collection Wizard...

"I have been advised to retain the services of a defamation attorney in this matter...."

Posted on May 07, 2010
Can anything good ever come out of a sentence that begins that way?It gets better:"If today?s news story in the Miami New Times is accurate," said Rekers in an e-mail to me, "I have been advised to retain the services of a defamation attorney in this matter, because the fact is that I am not gay and never have been...

Wet Hot South Florida Morning.

Posted on May 07, 2010
Hey, what do you know -- Jeff Sloman's a plaintiff's attorney!This great Julie Kay article on the perils of suing clients for unpaid fees is instructive, but I had another takeaway -- the perils of litigating issues instead of attempting to resolve them:The litigation triggered the competitor, Fort Myers-based Storm Catcher, to ask the U...

Shoot The Messenger

Posted on May 06, 2010
I'm glad I don't have to go to Broward court all that often.When I do, I find the usual annoyances -- parking, getting in, the meshuga elevator system, crowded/dysfunctional courthouse, lawyers wearing ratty tan blazers, some of the judges.....One thing I don't often (ever?) think about -- JAABlog's poisonous effect on the Broward judicial system...

Judge Cindy Lederman Is a Genius.

Posted on May 06, 2010
Here's why: "Dr. Rekers' testimony was far from a neutral and unbiased recitation of the relevant scientific evidence. Dr. Rekers' beliefs are motivated by his strong ideological and theological convictions that are not consistent with the science. Based on his testimony and demeanor at trial, the court can not consider his testimony to be credible nor worthy of forming the basis of public policy...

3d DCA Watch -- Lame Alter Ego Edition!

Posted on May 05, 2010
Feeling hot hot hot.Did someone mention there's something special going on today?What could it be?Why yes it is a tequila-soaked, taco-encrusted, sombrero-weary special edition of 3d DCA Watch:A.I.C. Trading v. Susman:Neat -- Judge Salter uses the highly technical legal phrase "lawyer up" in a written decision...

Hump Day Digital Dump

Posted on May 05, 2010
Hi kids, just another day in paradise.Let's see what's pinging around in my brain this morning:Steve Carell has a schmuck problem.Related -- I want to marry Sarah Silverman.I've got a brand new pair of roller skates, Mike Eidson's got a decades-old key...

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Posted on May 05, 2010
Stay safe, kiddies.

Time For Yet Another Blogger Ethics Panel!

Posted on May 04, 2010
Our friends in Broweird, already awash in facacta "investigations," may have another one on their hands, as reported by the always-excellent Bob Norman.This one, at least, (finally) has some naughty bits:Local attorney Barbara Heyer, who happens to be the wife of Broward County Judge Marc Gold, sent an oh-so serious letter -- with "exhibits," mind you -- to JAABlog administrator Bill Gelin that basically accused Gelin, a lawyer, of violating the Florida Bar by posting the racy photograph (shown at right) on his blog...

Oh Boy.

Posted on May 04, 2010
Judge Brown Sanctions Order 2 You know my favorite case?The one that makes writing this blog so, so easy?The one I've written about here and here?Well I have no idea what the underlying issue is, since Magistrate Judge Brown sealed the relevant pleadings, but this Order doesn't seem too good:This matter came before this Court on Plaintiffs' Ex Parte Emergency Motion for Protective Order (D...

Wine and Women

Posted on May 04, 2010
That's pretty much the takeaway from Susannah Nesmith's profile of A.J. Barranco, the incorrigible bachelor who turned an old bomb shelter into a make out pad, ala Donald Fagen's New Frontier:In addition to women, Barranco is fond of wine?he retrofitted a 1960s bomb shelter under his home as a wine cellar and bar, decorated with World War I recruiting posters from Europe and a sleek red leather couch...

How Can You Run When You Know?

Posted on May 04, 2010
Old news: four dead in Ohio.

Ben Solomon Hearts Charlie Crist!

Posted on May 03, 2010
I'm not a huge fan of pda, but in this case we can make an exception:"It's exactly what we need," said Ben Solomon, a Miami real estate lawyer who isn't registered with either party. "The question is, 'Do you think independently?' The answer should always be 'Yes...

Here's An Idea.

Posted on May 03, 2010
Morning, kids!Still thinking about the FBA B SD FL BABC.I love that scene from Trains, Planes and Automobiles, where Steve Martin suggests to John Candy how to tell a story:You know everything is not an anecdote. You have to discriminate. You choose things that are funny or mildly amusing or interesting...

FBA B SD FL BABC Awards!

Posted on May 01, 2010
Don't you hate lawyers who insist on lengthy, unwieldy acronyms to denote a party in a brief when it is abundantly obvious who is being referred to?Last I checked, these acronyms (or initialisms?) are supposed to assist, ease or otherwise make the reading experience better for the reader, not clog up a brief with technically accurate yet preposterously long combinations of random initials that serve no purpose other than to make your sentences unreadable...

SFL Friday -- Bench and Bar Edition

Posted on April 30, 2010
Well kids, it's off to Doral for an insightful and educational day of CLE -- oh hail, who are we kidding, it's a chance to schmooze with some bigshots -- but we might learn something while we're there anyways.I'm not sure Judge Dubina can match Judge Fay's speech from last time, but I'm willing to help out any way I can...

Paris Hilton Allegedly Owes Restitution

Posted on April 29, 2010
Yeah, you read right, restitution:Investors in Paris Hilton's 2006 box-office bomb "Pledge This!" claim she owes $1 million in restitution for supposedly not promoting the movie enough.The investors asked a Miami federal judge Thursday to force Hilton to repay her fee from the film...

Florida Joins UN International Arbitration New World Order!

Posted on April 29, 2010
You know how tea partiers/conservatives always rail about the UN, "foreign law," and that whole pesky New World Order thing?Well, you better not tell them Florida is poised to adopt -- gasp! -- UN standards for international arbitration:The Bar?s international law section, hopes the bill and new rule will prompt more companies to use Miami as their seat for arbitration because attorneys all over the world are familiar with the UNCITRAL model...

3d DCA Watch -- The Night They Cancelled 3d DCA Watch

Posted on April 28, 2010
Hi kids, what do you all think of those facacta Goldman Sachs emails? Seriously, what kind of intelligent professional puts that kind of stuff in writing?I also love the secret code used for discussions too sensitive to put in writing -- "LDL."Not exactly the Enigma Code, fellas...

Bad Buddy Cop Movie Fan Files Whistle Blower Suit!

Posted on April 27, 2010
We already know that former Miami budget chief Michael Boudreaux enjoys bad movies -- hail he was one of about 16 people in the nation who actually saw Cop Out in a movie theater -- but now the buddy cop genre aficionado has went ahead and filed a whistleblower suit -- just like Matt Damon in The Informant(!): Boudreaux's eight-page lawsuit said he intended to cooperate with the SEC inquiry -- but was punished for it...

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