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Last Entry: April 01, 2011 at 15:17:00

3d DCA Watch -- Promises Promises Edition

Posted on August 05, 2009
Kids, it's that time again -- admit it, it feels like Christmas comes every Wednesday -- when the resplendently robed ones appear to communicate with the faithful masses, the ham and schleppers, the poets and the dreamers, and all four of the sons from Passover...

Hit Me With Your Marine Hose!

Posted on August 05, 2009
MDLs are fun.They keep lawyers busy, usually there are interesting and sophisticated legal issues, and the judge often takes interest in and sometimes even ownership of the cases.I see Judge Graham has certified a class in the marine hose antitrust cases in a thoughtful, well-reasoned order...

"Szechuan Dumplings, After the Deal Has Been Done"

Posted on August 04, 2009
Oy this Alan Kluger, what a goyisher-cupp:"This incident further reinforces our suspicion of the deceptive practices and lengths the defendants will go to misrepresent themselves. It's not enough that they've tried to steal our signature dishes, but now they appear to be trying to update their menu with new ideas from our kitchen,'' says Alan Kluger, attorney for Mr...

Tom Julin Represents Milt Hirsch Accuser.

Posted on August 04, 2009
Over at Rump's place, they have been discussing for days this whole Milt Hirsch brouhaha.It's sorta like the criminal defense bar's version of the endless Mr. Clucky coverage -- it's catnip to those JBB lawyers.I've stayed away from the story, mostly because I have nothing to add as a civil litigator beyond that I know and respect Milton, plus the dude really knows how to rock a full beard...

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I've Got Nothing.

Posted on August 03, 2009
Hi folks!I don't know about you, but I'm a bit bored today.Sure I could point out Vanessa Blum's well-written profile of Steve Zack.BTW, did you know Steve does a Claude Pepper impression?Hmm, maybe I should say, is there anyone out there who doesn't know Steve does a Claude Pepper impression?Oh hail, perhaps the right question is -- does anyone even know who Claude Pepper is?Like Steve, I do a killer George Raft impression, but for some reason the youngsters at the Bar functions just don't get into it like they used to...

SFL Friday -- Your Roseanne Hitler Weekend Roundup

Posted on July 31, 2009
Well kids, we're here again -- the end of another work week, this time filled with pay cuts and job losses. And even some BigFirm anxiety (except for you, Greenberg Gal).Still, as always, there are silver linings.For example, I understand a position may have opened up within the legal department at Goldman Sachs...

Hooray South Florida -- We Set A New Low-Water Mark!

Posted on July 31, 2009
Hmm, I don't recall learning in law school how to hire somebody who paid somebody at a hospital for PI leads and then cutting that person a percentage of any fees generated, but you know how crazy kids are today: A Miami man was charged Thursday with buying confidential patient records from a Jackson Memorial Hospital employee over the past two years, and selling them to a lawyer suspected of soliciting the patients to file personal-injury claims...

"Dismiss All Charges"

Posted on July 30, 2009
Carlos Loumiet gets one big monkey completely off his back:Mr. Loumiet added: "I am very glad that this weight has been lifted and I can now move on, putting my full energies on my family, my practice and my work as chair of the New America Alliance, a national association for leading Latinos in U...

Do You Get Excited By Noncompetes?

Posted on July 30, 2009
I know I do.That's why I enjoyed this new 11th Circuit opinion that wades into the sometimes-murky waters of enforceability of noncompetes in Florida:In 1996, Florida adopted Fla. Stat. � 542.335, which "contains a comprehensiveframework for analyzing, evaluating and enforcing restrictive covenants containedin employment contracts...

3d DCA Watch -- The Seven Percent Solution Edition

Posted on July 29, 2009
Yes, yes and yes -- it's Wednesday!Assembled masses, we are joined together on this sacred day in mutual love and respect for our beneficent judicial overlords, who weekly speak to us in hushed tones, muted phrases, and furtive glances, employing that oldest and simplest means of lawyer seduction -- free coffee...

Scotty Was Right!

Posted on July 29, 2009
I love it when science catches up to science fiction, especially when it involves Star Trek:Oxford scientists have created a transparent form of aluminium by bombarding the metal with the world?s most powerful soft X-ray laser. 'Transparent aluminium' previously only existed in science fiction, featuring in the movie Star Trek IV, but the real material is an exotic new state of matter with implications for planetary science and nuclear fusion...

PACER Surfing With Pleasure P!

Posted on July 28, 2009
You all know how much I love music.That's why I found this case involving hot young R&B hearthrob Marcus Cooper a/ka/ "Pleasure P" so interesting.Cooper, a Miami native and former member of the raunchy local group Pretty Ricky, has struck out on his own and from the reviews on Amazon, he's got a pretty bright future...

Honey, Could You Scrub My Metadata?

Posted on July 28, 2009
I don't know about you, but I am sick to death of hearing about "metadata."Note to prominent BigLaw attorney I chatted with the other day at Gordon Biersch -- there is nothing more boring than a metadata war story.Seriously, tell me about your brilliant cross-examination, your last mediation, your car, your kids, your house, your vacation -- anything...

Special New Policy on Makin' Things Up -- Today Only!

Posted on July 27, 2009
Hi folks, it's Monday (again).I was moved yesterday by this heartfelt tribute.So, in honor of the American Soldier, I'm gonna quit makin' things up.You know, that felt pretty good.Ok, I'm done.Speaking of heartfelt tributes, John Pacenti reviews Judge Moreno, and says he's funny, entertaining, and informative, but that G-Force is still better family fare...

What Did You Do During Your "Gap Period"?

Posted on July 27, 2009
Sheesh, I didn't even know I had a "gap period," but the 11th ruled today that FedEx employees cannot proceed on a class-wide basis for failing to be paid during their "gap period."A fairly standard opinion, though I think they went off the rails a bit on the quantum meruit ruling...

SFL Friday -- Southern Nights (and Grouts) Edition

Posted on July 24, 2009
Hi kids, yes it's Friday and yes I'm packing it in early. In fact, I'm taking the whole day off.I hope you all get to sneak out early today too.Did you all see this 11th Circuit opinion released yesterday on "late" discovery and amending the pleadings?First of all, I love the name -- Southern Grouts...

Your Friday Afternoon Kidney-Selling Rabbi Send-Off

Posted on July 24, 2009
Kidney-selling Rabbis?Oy, oy, and triple-oy.And I thought Turistas was far-fetched.Well I doublechecked and as far as I know, I am not in violation of any trial orders, pleading deadlines, or discovery rules.Yet.Before I go, I want to say thank you to Lew Freeman for that great shin-dig the other day -- it was Titanic, buddy...

Is Iqbal the New Twombly?

Posted on July 23, 2009
Remember when Twombly came out in late 2006 and it showed up in just about every motion to dismiss?Twombly, Twombly, Twombly.Everywhere you went, people were talking about "Twombly."You had to pretend to know something about it at judicial functions, there were teleconferences on it, and associates billed incessantly to copy and paste the part of the brief that dealt with it over and over and over again...

Calling It Quits.

Posted on July 23, 2009
Oooh, tough loss for Jack Scarola, a mucho-fine trial lawyer:A Fort Lauderdale, Fla., jury on Wednesday ordered accounting giant Ernst & Young to pay $10.2 million on a negligent auditing claim, rejecting a request for $400 million on more serious allegations...

3d DCA Watch -- The Written Utterances Have Arrived Edition!

Posted on July 22, 2009
Hi kids, can you believe it's only Wednesday?The good news is the written utterances have arrived!!Oh boy I'm so excited let me repeat -- the written utterances have arrived!!!In fact, I don't have to tell you things are bad. Everybody knows things are bad...

Nick Nanton Is A Celebrity Lawyer.

Posted on July 22, 2009
Alana Roberts confirms and expands on the Akerman pay cuts we talked about Monday:One source said the cuts may not affect all of the firm?s associates in the same way over time.?The associates who are performing on a very high level probably won?t at the end of the day receive pay cuts...

Less Awful Days Are Here Again!

Posted on July 21, 2009
That's the lede in this solid article on South Florida lawyers starting to make deals again, by the always intrepid Julie Kay:Jim Meyer, a partner at Harper Meyer in Miami, said it feels like ``the dam has burst.''''The first few months of the year, everyone seemed to be in a holding pattern,'' he said...

Animal Rights -- Doggone Funny?

Posted on July 20, 2009
I was reading this story about Jason Wandner's efforts to save Mercedes, a Broward pit bull that is about to be euthanized for killing a neighborhood cat under Broward County's strict new one-strike law:Supporters argue the new law helps save more innocent animals from being killed in future attacks...

Pay Cuts At Akerman?

Posted on July 20, 2009
Heard something about 10 percent along the line.Thanks to the tipsters, I appreciate it!

Good News For New Lawyers -- You Can Help Others!

Posted on July 17, 2009
Are you really sure you want to go to law school?That's the message of incoming dean Patricia White of the UM School of Law, in this interesting DBR article on the future of the profession:Issues affecting the legal industry are serious enough that White wrote incoming first-year law students encouraging them to defer admission for a year, partly because a larger than expected number of deposits arrived from students who plan to attend this fall because of the recession...

SFL Friday -- Happy Nazi Gnomes Edition.

Posted on July 17, 2009
It's pretty much well-known that I adore Nazi gnomes.That's why I was thrilled to see this nice gentleman from Nuremberg and his noncontroversial garden gnome that just happens to be performing the Hitler salute.Seriously, what better way to highlight your gardenias and perennials than a gleaming golden gnome paying tribute to Der Fuhrer?Oh well, sorry I was busy today performing Important Legal Stuff, but I am now heading out for a glorious weekend filled with wet hot American windsurfing...

We Choose The Moon!

Posted on July 16, 2009
Isn't everybody tired of the law already?Watching the Sotomayor confirmation hearings have left me with a major case of the law blahs.It's like watching an intelligent woman have to repeatedly explain basic legal concepts to complete idiots, over and over and over again...

3d DCA Watch -- Judge Schwartz "Feels Unbound" Edition

Posted on July 15, 2009
Hi kids, anyone notice it's hot as hail out there?I was going to leave for some early mid-week windsurfing, but then I realized today is that day, yes the exulted day, the only day when the written utterances emerge nearly unscathed from the fortified Concrete Bunker of Justice, that day of all days when the resplendently robed ones issue their guidance, their counsel, hail even their opinions, yes coffee-swillers hold on to your seats as we embark on a twisty-turvy nonstop emotional journey through the feelings of the judicial mind, in this week's totally effusive edition of 3d DCA Watch:Manzano v...

Alan Kluger: "Meet Me At Midnight At Mr. Chow's"

Posted on July 15, 2009
So, anybody watch Senator Lindsey Graham yesterday afternoon -- what a d*%k.Just in terms of cross-examination technique, what did you all think?Graham's a pretty talented trial lawyer, yet here he is pulling out one of the lamest tricks in the book -- pretending to "forget" where he put the "wise Latina" quote so that he could ask Judge Sotomayor -- twice -- to repeat it from memory!Then he's all over the map, moving from abortion to the death penalty in a seemingly random way...

Good Oral Argument Tip -- Try Not To Lie.

Posted on July 14, 2009
Don't you hate it when a witness lies under oath?Actually I enjoy it, at least when I am cross-examining the little weasel.The CIA, which knows a thing or two about lying, came up with this nifty list of how to determine if someone is lying:The goal is to find ?clusters?? of deceptive behavior...

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