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Devoted to the lawyers of South Florida, their goings and doings, their peculiarities and personalities, all done with humor, love, jealousy, snark and just a little bit of class.

Post Frequency: 15.3/day

Last Entry: April 01, 2011 at 15:17:00

"For Once, The Rich White Man Is In Control."

Posted on June 02, 2009
Sorry folks I got caught up writing an 11th Circuit response brief, and missed all the fun yesterday.As I was working on the brief, I was reminded again of V.S. Naipaul's advice for young writers:"I didn't know how you seduced a woman, how you excited her and thought of her pleasure...

Oh Well -- He Still Is Dating Elle MacPherson.

Posted on June 01, 2009
Hi kids, it's Monday and it will probably rain again!Poor Jeff Soffer. The Turnberry heir picked the wrong time to invest in the Las Vegas condo market, picked the wrong time to give half of his hotel to the Saudis in order to drop a half billion in renovations to the Fontainebleau, and even had to deny having an affair with Gwyneth Paltrow...

SFL Friday -- Before The Flood

Posted on May 29, 2009
Didn't this week start with the weather all dark and rainy? Why does Friday feel like Monday?But that's ok, it's always windsurfing weather somewhere -- you just have to find it like. say, in China.But I hope you stay dry and do something productive and fun this weekend...

Are Ted Olsen And David Boies Just Better Than We Are?

Posted on May 29, 2009
Via AL there is an interesting post at PrawfsBlawg on the new suit by Ted Olsen and David Boies that challenges Prop 8 on Constitutional grounds.I just read the complaint and think it's a total crapshoot, as the issues are framed as purely ones of Due Process and Equal Protection under the United States Constitution...

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Pacer Surfing With SFL!

Posted on May 29, 2009
Hi kids, in a continuing effort to bore me to tears, I have reviewed some recent civil case filings in our dainty little district, and found one that is mildly interesting.Indeed, the pretrial conference is set before Judge Ungaro at 11:30 this morning...

Keep Your Cards And Letters Coming!

Posted on May 28, 2009
Well it sure is flattering to read some of your mail.Good thing I can see that what might be perceived by a more thin-skinned civil law blogger as a vicious or derogatory insult is in fact just a playful, perhaps flirtatious effort at getting to know me better...

Congrats John Shawde -- Don't Take Me Alive.

Posted on May 28, 2009
So this morning I broke out my Keytar and pretended to be a rock star again:I'm a bookkeepers sonI don't want to shoot no oneWell I crossed my old man back in OregonDon't take me aliveGot a case of dynamiteI could hold out here all nightYes I crossed my old man back in OregonDon't take me aliveIt lasted for about 20 minutes or so and then I got a call from Jaime Bianchi...

3d DCA Watch -- Empathetic, Intellectually Mediocre Latina Judges Edition

Posted on May 27, 2009
Hi kids -- are you sick to death yet of all the hacktacular Sotomayor coverage?Between Sotomayor and Jon and Kate all day, everyday, I'm about ready to pull a Papa Hemingway myself if this doesn't end soon.Have we returned to 2005 and entered Stupidville again?For example, did you know that if you graduated summa from Princeton and was EIC of the Yale Law Review, that makes you "intellectually mediocre"?Employing the laziest of stereotypes, it's a proven fact that if you are Hispanic and female you are by definition "temperamental and excitable" and possibly "Che Guevara in robes...

Ricci And Hemingway, Attorneys At Law?

Posted on May 27, 2009
Did anyone take a look at the inside first page of the new June Florida Bar Journal?There's none other than Ed Ricci, standing shoulder to shoulder and arm-in-arm with Ernest Hemingway, someone who I thought at one point was in fact dead (not you, Ed)...

Oh Hail It's Tuesday.

Posted on May 26, 2009
Hi online addicts!Welcome to your work week, folks.Well I hope you all had a restful and peaceful Memorial Day weekend, and at least paused for a moment to honor the many who have sacrificed so much in defense of our country.Somehow I windsurfed myself all the way out to Elliott Key yesterday, so I apologize for not getting a post up to mark the holiday...

Bill McCollum's (Non) Journey Through the Past

Posted on May 26, 2009
It's dark and rainy and everybody seems to be working.Bah humbug.Oh this is exciting -- all you broker/dealer securities litigators may get a boost from this proposed FINRA revision: The Financial Industry Regulatory Authority, or Finra, is requesting comment on whether it should file a rule proposal with the Securities and Exchange Commission that could expand existing suitability obligations for brokers...

Cranky Old Jew Turns 68!

Posted on May 24, 2009
Happy B-Day, Bobby D.You did good.

SFL Friday -- Wet Hot American Weekend.

Posted on May 22, 2009
Well it's Memorial Day weekend and I am sure many of you have already left your offices for parts unknown, to the east, west, south and north somewhat, as someone famous once said.But it's almost summer, so that means movies, right?Like the Star Trek reboot, which in my view captured the tone, humor, and humanity of the original while injecting fresh blood and some real vitality back into the franchise...

PACER Surfing With SFL!

Posted on May 22, 2009
You guys ever PACER surf?You know, go onto PACER and plug in some attorney's name or law firm or some defendant to see what they're up to here in the Southern District?No, me neither.But just for kicks I plugged in two of my favorite South Florida attorneys, Chris Carver and Hilarie Bass...

Overworked And Underpaid Thursday.

Posted on May 21, 2009
Ever come into the office and just get hacked off?No particular reason, but you feel like all the crap -- cases, clients, colleagues, judges, opposing counsel, upcoming hearings, trips etc. -- builds up and you need an outlet for the hostility and aggression...

Rachlin Merges; Older Male Judges Discuss What Women Attorneys Are Wearing

Posted on May 21, 2009
Many of us have hired these guys as experts over the years, and I see the firm is merging and changing its name:South Florida's eighth-largest accounting firm, Rachlin LLP, is merging with Marcum & Kliegman LLP, the largest accounting firm on New York?s Long Island...

When Is Trump Tower Not Trump Tower?

Posted on May 20, 2009
When The Donald says it's not:Thirty buyers of Trump International units at 551 N. Fort Lauderdale Beach Blvd. are suing the developers and Trump for allegedly misleading them into thinking the TV star's participation was a sure thing. Though sales contracts identify the project as the SB Fort Lauderdale Hotel & Condominium and state that Trump can withdraw from the licensing deal, the suit claims that marketing materials suggested Trump was on board as a developer...

3d DCA Watch -- It's A Carnival Out There.

Posted on May 20, 2009
Well, I've walked these streetsin a spectacle of wealth and povertyin the diamond marketsthe scarlet welcome carpetthat they just rolled out for meAnd I've walked these streetsin the mad house asylumthey can bewhere a wild eyed misfit propheton a traffic island stoppedand he raved of saving me Oh trial courts, why do you torture the 3d DCA so?Whenever I edit briefs by an associate, I am reminded of that great line from V...

New Local Rule -- All South Florida Lawyers Must Have Something To Do With Chinese Drywall.

Posted on May 19, 2009
If I hear the words "Chinese Drywall" one more time I will pull a Carver, or a Shumie, or something and heads will roll.For the love of God please don't send me things like this:Attorney C. David Durkee, partner with the Florida law firm Roberts & Durkee, announced the scheduling of a town hall meeting in Lake Worth, Fla...

Big Money!

Posted on May 19, 2009
Since I see everyone and David O. Markus is commenting on Jeffrey Toobin's profile of Chief Justice Roberts, I might as well put my two crappy cents in.For us civil litigators, here's the part I found interesting:In one respect, Roberts?s series of prestigious jobs all amounted to doing the same thing for more than twenty years?reading and writing appellate briefs and, later, appellate decisions...

If A Tree Falls In The Forest......

Posted on May 19, 2009
By Guest Blogger: George Berkeley was a smart man, or he took a lot of acid. He opined about objects ceasing to exist, once there was nobody around to perceive them. Or to give a crap. Which is sort of like what is happening to Paris Hilton. But like botox or saline, Chief Judge Moreno has intervened to delay, albeit briefly, the inevitable, ruling that there are enough issues in dispute for a trial to begin on June 8: The judge says one issue is whether Hilton was actually too busy or decided not to promote "Pledge This!" because she hated the movie...

Stuart Slotnick Wraps Up Another One.

Posted on May 18, 2009
A commenter points us once again to Buchanan Ingersoll litigator Stuart Slotnick.You may recall Stuart planned to make Woody's relationship with Soon-Yi the focus of his client American Apparel's defense of Woody's $10 million privacy infringement claim...

Is Shareef Malnick Full of Crap?

Posted on May 18, 2009
Well that was a fast weekend, wasn't it?Mine was uneventful, filled as it always is with windsurfing, Bolero, amateur photography, certain mixed drinks and of course careful study of the Book of Proverbs.Boy, that King Solomon sure was a shmartie, huh? For example, he said things that even apply to the practice of law, such as:Better is the poor that walketh in his integrity, than he that is perverse in his lips, and is a fool...

Marco Rubio Vows to Be An Unpopular Leader Who Will Emancipate Us From Medicare.

Posted on May 17, 2009
Oh 20 percenters, how I love you so.Especially the South Florida variety, where the rhetoric skews both stupid and comic, often at the same time!Consider our lawyer friend Marco Rubio, who is challenging the sunny centrist Charlie Crist.According to one of Rubio's supporters, Charlie hasn't "manned up...

In The 1920s, Could You "Text Message" The Ice Deliveryman?

Posted on May 15, 2009
I know how much Judge Silverman loves to preserve and celebrate our heritage, particularly as it relates to the courts and our rich South Florida judicial history.So he would know for sure, but I'm fairly certain that in the old days you could not text message your boss from the witness stand about your testimony:While the judge and attorneys conferred, a courtroom spectator passed a note to a defense attorney saying the witness, Sky Development chief operating officer Gavin Sussman, appeared to be text-messaging Sky chief executive Yizhak Toledano at the plaintiff table...

SFL Friday -- Open Up My Heart And Look Inside.

Posted on May 15, 2009
Hi folks, well as usual Rumpy is correct -- today is in fact Friday. But that's good, right?Maybe it's all that talk earlier about "feminine tannins," but I've been in a romantic mood all day -- I hope you are too.Boy, you guys never send me enough juicy stuff about local lawyers, law firms, or cases, but you all love to send me links for a Friday afternoon post...

Mark Tobin Is Proud of His Bottles.

Posted on May 15, 2009
Hi folks, lots of fun stories floating around today.First, as anyone working at a big firm knows, conflicts checks are a real hassle.Just ask my buddy and excellent lawyer extraordinare Pedro Martinez-Fraga:Martinez-Fraga asked to withdraw as counsel for the Chilean government in all four of the Miami cases after the conflict issue was raised by Berger Singerman attorneys Mitchell Berger of Fort Lauderdale and James Cunningham Jr...

SFL Fashion Watch -- Try To Look Like The Guy From Your IS Department.

Posted on May 14, 2009
It's Friday, right?I mean, where the hail is everybody?I know Steve Zack is in South Africa (seriously) but what happened to everyone else?So let's talk fashion. To me, "Flagler Fashion" means a big red nose, a seat at the bar at Sally Russell's, two dry Gin Gibsons, and some various crumpled papers from several different cases loosely assembled in one old, beat-up redweld...

Welcome, "Guest Blogger"!

Posted on May 14, 2009
Folks, below is a guest post from a well-regarded, talented and successful South Florida litigator, who has kindly submitted the following contribution for your Thursday afternoon entertainment:Guest Blogger, here. I know, I know: You are angry. "Why is HE a guest blogger!?!? I've been reading this blog since DAY ONE! This just isn't fair! What does HE have, that I don't have?" Calm down, calm down...

You've Got To Be Carefully Taught

Posted on May 14, 2009
Hi kids, unbelievably swamped today, but digging out.Enjoy this version of an old ditty from "South Pacific." John finally starts singing about four and a half minutes in.See you after lunch.

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