Law Humor

Most of us have "called in sick" at one point or another, when we probably could have dragged ourselves into the office but had other priorities.  But who among us has been as creative, determined, and stupid as Daniel Kuch, of Pasco, Washington?  None among us, that's who.

Kuch was shot in the shoulder last Thursday, and initially told police he had been the victim of a drive-by while he was out jogging.  It seems that the investigation circled back around to Kuch fairly quickly, and detectives said Kuch eventually admitted that he had asked his good friend Kurtis Johnson to shoot him so that Kuch could "get some time off work."  Friends don't let friends shoot themselves, I guess.

Reportedly, and unsurprisingly, Kuch also hoped to avoid an upcoming drug test during his bullet-induced vacation.

The shooter was arrested for investigation of possible reckless-endangerment charges, which I guess raises the question whether you can be prosecuted for recklessly endangering somebody who asked you to endanger them.  I'm not sure who is going to press charges.  The shootee, meanwhile, was also arrested and was expected to face charges of false reporting.

He has, however, successfully gotten at least some time off.  According to the report, detectives "declined to say where Kuch works, or whether he still has a job," but he probably doesn't.  "It wasn't known if he had obtained a lawyer," but he probably should.

Link: CBS News