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Law Humor

: Bernard Madoff

Ron Paul Backs Up Madoff Statements

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I'm uploading this from my blackberry right now--I was stuck in court with Ira for a few hours merely to explain why we have every right to give some of our jewelry as gifts to our kids, my brother and my housekeeper. They're not entitled to have some of the heirlooms from our safe deposit boxes?? My housekeeper shouldn't have a Christmas gift?? This is what the prosecutor thinks should be a good reason to change my bond terms, and otherwise move me to a jail cell so that the taxpayers can pay my rent and my food? Is everyone crazy?? Ira--how do I plead insanity when the prosecutor is nuts?!

So anyway, I'm sitting in my limo watching CSPAN on TV. F--k; more taxpayer money be wasted as politicians in Washington hold one of their famous committee meetings to figure out how my friends at the SEC might have failed to do their job. Don't blame them. They did the jobs they were paid to do.

And part of the deal that comes with having a job at the SEC is that after a few years, you get to have a job on Wall Street. Its the same deal that comes with jobs at the IRS, the Department of Defense, the Department of Energy, the US Treasury, and obviously, the same deal that comes with having a job at the US Dept of Justice. When you serve your country, you are entitled to get a good job in the private sector. There's nothing wrong with that.

And is there something wrong with having a job in government, then falling in love with someone and getting a job in that person's family business?? If some wacko in congress wants to impose more rules that put regulate all of those things, than I'm taking my private jet and headed straight to Mustique.

All of that said, I raise my glass of Diet Coke to Ron Paul. I just heard him say that people like me aren't to blame for purported Ponzi schemes; businessmen like me are just emulating the business model that the US Government has been promoting for decades. If the US Government can do it, than it must be legal.

And, you can certainly expect Ira to be having Rep. Paul testify on my behalf, in the event my case even goes to trial. Which it won't. Or maybe it will. Who knows?? Right now, with all of this stress, I'm not sure what my name is. (How was that, Ira?)

Full post as published by Bernard Madoff on January 05, 2009 (boomark / email).

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