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I'm getting ready to go to Ezra's for the Seder--but wanted to drop you this note. I actually don't even want to go, but Ezra sounded lonely on the phone and insisted that we come by. I'm bringing Esmeralda to taste test, just in case. You always told me I had to be careful about Ezra..

It was a lovely time we had together yesterday afternoon, wasn't it? You're being SO brave.

Maybe I shouldn't have had my botox refreshed in Florida, but that photo of me shopping for groceries really got me so upset. I had to fix myself up. Louis was sweet enough to come to the house to do my highlights. A girl has to keep up her standards no matter what the circumstances.

Perhaps just seeing me made you remember all the fun we had at home, and got you all hot under the jumpsuit? ( Sorry, darling, but that orange thing is just not your style).

But, please, Bernie, remember everyone who is ANYONE is reading your blog. You're infuriating the Spitzer family can't possibly help the situation. You know how ruthless Bernie can be, and of course, how vindictive little Eliot has always been.

I wish you'd stop already, but i know you feel you want the truth to come out - well some of the truth anyway. (Remember, take the "T" away from TRUTH and what do you have.??

ME, that's what you have! Vulnerable and alone , with all this crap coming back to me in phone calls, tweets, texts and angry calls from the kids asking for more money - as if!

Darling, just control yourself a little and the twitch will get better. Take off a few days for Passover. The Rabbi told me that you'll have a nice Seder with him and the only two other Jews at MCC. But, Bernie, you cannot ask or answer the Four Questions!

Not only are you not the youngest, but you know the MOST. So let the kid with the Yarmulke, who did God only knows what to his girlfriend's father's diamond business, have that honor.

You can hide the Matzoh under the printer cartridges, and give $5 at the commissary to the finder. (ooops, strike the word "finder". Ezra, Jaffe, Sonny, and those Connecticut Yankees are mad enough.)

OK, Bernie, button it. Let the SEC find their own info. It'll take them so long, we would be out of the land of Egypt in real time - kind of like the rate at which the SIPC checks are being released. The way these different groups are chasing each other around is hysterical--just like you said; "....Keystone cops."

Let the kids write for a few days, please darling. and don't eat all the macaroons the at the same time - that horrible little toilet will overflow. And you know how too much Matzoh will stuff you up...Oy..

Maybe they'll leave your cell door open for Elijah!! ha ha, a little jokie from Ruthie to her Bernie -cute as ever.

See you again real soon; I'm bringing the boys, whether they like it or not. Andrew is having tantrums every time I mention going to see you. He was always our willful child. That incident with Shana and the leg waxing is almost as embarrassing as this entire situation.

Keep your spirits up - I'm sure, in June, they'll send you to one of those nice Country Club places.. and we can play golf again. Just like at Fresh Meadows!! I'll bring picnics from Zabars; it will be much easier if we have c -o-n-j-u-g-a-l visits.....

BTW--I've just picked up this fabulous, and terribly smutty new book. All about a woman Wall Street lawyer---God forbid Shana should have had such a colorful life...although she's still young, and she's got more than a few notches on her Gucci belts..

But I know what you like to read, and you're going to love this book! Its already making me tingle and, well you know.....

I'll get you my copy as soon as I'm done, but if the commissary can order your very own, click here...

Kisses.
RAM

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