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Law Humor

Legal Antics

Chronicling legal humor-- because let's face it-- lawyers take themselves far too seriously and the law is damn funny if you look at it through the right lens.
By Nicole Black, Esq.

Post Frequency: 2.5/day

Last Entry: August 08, 2011 at 07:55:00

I'm thinking this guy works for the sunscreen industry.

Posted on March 31, 2010
Edgy White Lawyer ADORES darkly tanned, exotic women - 42 (Midtown) Date: 2010-03-26, 8:05PM EDT Reply To This Post This classy and sweet yet fun, spicy and edgy white lawyer is EXTREMELY partial to slim, sexy, darkly tanned exotic women,...

Nothing wrong with respect.

Posted on March 30, 2010
Respect for the elderly. State (to 85 year old witness) - Could you look around the court and tell us do you see the man that robbed you. Witness turns and looks around the entire courtroom and at the defendant,...

At least he's got a system.

Posted on March 29, 2010
Via Courtoons:

"Social Media for Lawyers: The Next Frontier" Preview Launch at ABA TechShow

Posted on March 19, 2010
My new book, Social Media for Lawyers: The Next Frontier, will be published in just a few weeks. My co-author, Carolyn Elefant and I are extremely excited about it and will be launching a preview of the book at the...

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How municipality can save money: cops do everyone's job.

Posted on March 17, 2010
Witness (police officer) - I had a reasonable suspicion he had a weapon. Judge - I'll decide that. Thank you. (Hat tip: On the Record in Cook County)

Anyone else think this guy's probably a "4"--at best?

Posted on March 16, 2010
Temple Law Student Wants to Party with Some Undergrads - m4w - 24 (Temple) Date: 2010-02-22, 12:40PM EST Reply To This Post I'm tired of the lame law school girls. Tired of 6s who act like they're 9s just because...

If only life were really like this...the world would be a better place.

Posted on March 15, 2010

Remove metadata--even when sending documents from your phone.

Posted on March 12, 2010
In the latest episode of lawtechTalk, you'll learn all about metadata--what it is, the risks it presents, your ethical obligations and how to remove it from your legal documents, even when sending documents via email using a smart phone. During...

Seems like a reasonable request to me

Posted on March 10, 2010
Via On the Record in Cook County: Judge (after finding defendant not guilty of burglary to an auto based on lack of evidence connecting burglary tools to the defendant) - Do you have anything to say?Defendant - Yeah, can I...

One more reason our profession is oh-so-popular.

Posted on March 09, 2010
Hat tip: Smoking Gun

Pretty sneaky, NYPD. No...wait. I take it back.

Posted on March 08, 2010

It's funny because it's sad--and true.

Posted on March 03, 2010
Via Courtoons:

Hard to argue with that--it's technically correct.

Posted on March 02, 2010
Via a new blog, Overheard in Court, comes the following: Testimony from a child witness. Q. Where do you live? A. Across the street from my neighbors. ***** (Overheard in Court is currently holding a contest for the funniest courtroom...

Aw shucks. What a nice, altruistic young man...

Posted on March 01, 2010
Young Lawyer Looking To Spoil A Girl As A Friend Only! - m4w - 24 (Beverly Hills, CA) Date: 2010-02-26, 10:48AM PST Reply To This Post I am a recent law school graduate and I am working full-time as a...

If the shoe fits...

Posted on February 24, 2010
Via On the Record in Cook County: Defense Counsel- This officer's police department exists in a localized anachronism, where they feel it's ok to stop people based on race without recrimination. State- I object judge! Judge- Basis? State- Defense counsel...

So therefore, if she weighs the same as a duck...

Posted on February 23, 2010
Via Overlawyered:

ABA speaking engagement: Social media for lawyers in Philadelphia on 5/6

Posted on February 23, 2010
I'll be speaking at the ABA Section of Real Property, Trust and Estate Law's annual Symposia on May 7th in Philadelphia. The panel is entitled: "The New Social Media: Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, and LinkedIn-Blessing or Plague?" We'll be discussing the...

It's all about prorities.

Posted on February 22, 2010
Via the Fail Blog:

I've always said we needed a law against this...

Posted on February 10, 2010

I seriously question a man who delegates his personal ads.

Posted on February 09, 2010
Lawyer looking for a lady to date - 36 (Queens) Date: 2010-02-08, 2:06PM EST Reply To This Post Hey ladies, My name is Stacy and I?m an assistant to a lawyer who?s looking for a girl to date and take...

Stupid rules of evidence. Also stupid: witnesses.

Posted on February 08, 2010
Just say calibrate! State - Then what do you do? Expert - We check the machines to make sure they are measuring correctly. State - Do you have a word for that? Expert - No. State - Are you sure?!...

Seeking feedback for my upcoming ABA book on cloud computing for lawyers

Posted on February 06, 2010
Image via Wikipedia I'm very excited to announce that I'm writing a book about cloud computing for lawyers that the American Bar Association will be publishing at the end of 2010. This book will explain the concept of cloud computing,...

Someone help this guy out. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Posted on February 03, 2010

The poor guy--I'm sure he'd rather keep that kind of thing private.

Posted on February 02, 2010
It's a common theme amongst public defenders: Defendant - Judge, I want another public defender, because this man is incontinent. Via On the Record in Cook County.

He's got it all--even a....pretty face?

Posted on February 01, 2010
SEXY, TAN, MUSCULAR LAWYER / MODEL LOOKING FOR PRETTY N SMART GIRL Date: 2010-01-30, 2:42PM PST Reply To This Post This is for all of the girls out there who are smart and sexy and fun. Why is it so...

Mmmm, chicken.

Posted on January 27, 2010
Judge - Mr. States Attorney are you going to agree to continue this case? State - Yes Judge. Counsel gave me a courtesy call so I have already called off my witnesses. Judge - Oh you did that without checking...

She's got a point--it really does hurt.

Posted on January 26, 2010
Hat tip: Simple Justice

Watch the latest lawtechTalk episode for FREE

Posted on January 26, 2010
This screencast features, and is sponsored by, the following legal technology products: Firmex--provides secure, virtual data rooms, which can be used in a legal corporate environment to manage online due diligence, exchange closing drafts, create digital record books, share litigation...

The expression "open mouth, insert foot" takes on a whole new meaning.

Posted on January 25, 2010
YOUNG W/ PRETTY FEET? Fast Easy Cash! - 39 (Manhattan) Date: 2010-01-22, 12:47PM EST Reply To This Post Handsome Attorney in Manhattan looking for one pretty younger girl age 18-21. 6'3" athletic SWM. Very simple, safe & fun scenario. I...

She'll...ahem..settle for cds.

Posted on January 21, 2010
Image by absoblogginlutely via Flickr Hot Tax Attorney Still Looking - w4m - 27 (Financial District) Date: 2010-01-17, 2:54AM EST Reply To This Post Need someone to screw me on tax forms as the ultimate . Must be hot nubile...

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