Law Humor

New Forbes Column on Crunch Berries, Froot Loops Cases

Posted on July 22, 2010
Although this is a saga that long-time LTB readers may be quite familiar with by now (see, e.g., "Reasonable Consumer Would Know 'Crunch Berries' Are Not Real, Judge Rules," Lowering the Bar (June 2, 2009)), my column this week for...

Blagojevich: Dying to Testify, Or Maybe Not

Posted on July 21, 2010
All quotes from Rod Blagojevich, except as indicated: Dec. 19, 2008: "I'm dying to answer these charges. I am dying to show you how innocent I am. . . . I intend to answer every allegation that comes my way....

Proposed Law Would Make It Illegal to Hoot After 11 P.M.

Posted on July 20, 2010
Fed up with noisy visitors, the city council of Sullivan's Island, South Carolina, appears likely to pass an ordinance that would make it illegal to, inter alia, hoot between the hours of 11 p.m. and 7 a.m. or at any...

Kansas Man's 0.57 BAC Impressive, But Not a Record

Posted on July 19, 2010
According to the Wichita Eagle, a man who was treated at a local hospital for an injury to the back of his head was found to have a blood-alcohol concentration of 0.57. That is seven times the legal limit for...

To access this complete feed in the blog feed reader login or register for free.

Update on the Fraudulent Photoshopper

Posted on July 19, 2010
Daryl Simon seems to have included his bogus charity photos in an appendix to his sentencing memorandum, but I was unable to find that on the court's docket. It may not have been posted yet, but that seems odd given...

TIP: Photoshopping Self Into Charity Photos Not Likely to Result In Lighter Sentence

Posted on July 19, 2010
In a final effort to put his fraud skills to good use, Daryl Simon tried to scam the court that was about to sentence him by offering fake documents and pictures to support his bid for leniency. Unfortunately for him,...

Good Reason to Kill #9: That There Is My Fryin' Pan

Posted on July 16, 2010
A good opening for this story on July 10: "A dispute over the ownership of a frying pan led to third-degree burns for one South Bend man and 11 stitches for another, police reports said." Apparently, one man was cooking...

U.S. Pilot Detained in Rio After Dropping Pants at Checkpoint

Posted on July 16, 2010
In June, United Airlines pilot Michael Slynn was briefly detained at the airport in Rio de Janeiro after he dropped his pants at a security checkpoint. According to the report, Slynn was asked to remove his belt and shoes, and...

Harassment Case Against Steven Seagal Dismissed

Posted on July 15, 2010
According to the Huffington Post, the $1 million harassment lawsuit against Steven Seagal has been dismissed. No reason was given, which probably means some sort of settlement, but of course that does not necessarily mean there was anything to the...

Search of Lehman Brothers E-Mails Suggests Words, Phrases to Avoid

Posted on July 15, 2010
The piece below was my second column for Forbes.com. There have been two since, and I will get those posted here shortly. Forbes (the website, not Steve personally) has just posted my latest column, about a study finding that the...

TSA Advertising Job Openings on Top of Pizza Boxes

Posted on July 14, 2010
Oh, this is confidence-inspiring: Am I wrong, or are the most likely new recruits from this campaign those who are currently making and/or delivering pizzas? Are they going to at least screen out people who have ever failed to get...

Prosecution Winding Down in Blagojevich Trial

Posted on July 13, 2010
In case you had forgotten about Rod Blagojevich, he's still on trial, and still proclaiming his innocence. Yelling it, actually. "Rod Blagojevich yells his innocence as he comes out of federal court Thursday afternoon." (Chicago Sun-Times) The latest summary from...

"Fleeting Expletives" Policy Struck Down Again

Posted on July 13, 2010
Good news for expletive-users - the Second Circuit has struck down the FCC's "fleeting expletive" policy, holding that it violates the First Amendment. As you may recall, this policy was put in place after Bono dropped an F-bomb at the...

From the Docket: Alleged Failure to Supervise Knife Use

Posted on July 12, 2010
Aprille Mammone v. Vector Marketing Corporation; Jordan Anderson, No. CV 1003399 (Marin County Super. Ct. filed June 29, 2010). Complaint for negligence. The defendants were engaged in a sales presentation of kitchen and sporting knives when they negligently allowed the...

What We Can Learn From Lindsay Lohan's Courtroom Notes

Posted on July 09, 2010
First and most importantly, when covering your face with notes you have taken in court, the side you have written on should face toward you: Second, Lindsay has excellent handwriting, the downside of which is that your notes may be...

Fools Convicted

Posted on July 08, 2010
Conviction affirmed, technically, but I liked the sound of this headline better. Kurt Johnson and Dale Heineman were accused of scamming homeowners by promising to get rid of their mortgage debt for a fee. They did get rid of it,...

United States Vs. One Moon Rock

Posted on July 08, 2010
My latest column for Forbes.com, "United States v. One Moon Rock," has been posted, and you can read it by clicking here and then pointing your eyeballs at the resulting page. (More later on why "Moon" should be capitalized when...

Why Poland Has Three Presidents Today

Posted on July 08, 2010
According to FOX News, the fair-and-balanced (and, as it turns out, accurate) source of Polish-presidential-succession information, Poland had three different presidents today (July 8), depending on what time it was. When he woke up this morning, Bronislaw Komorowski was the...

Men at Work Must Hand Over Five Percent of "Down Under" Royalties

Posted on July 07, 2010
The judge who ruled in February that Men at Work wrongfully copied part of its 1980s hit "Down Under" ruled this week that the group would have to pay the copyright holder five percent of all royalties earned on the...

About Blawg Review

Posted on July 07, 2010
If your mind was thoroughly blown by this weekend's post, Blawg Review #271, that is not necessarily a bad thing but I probably should have explained that I was hosting the latest edition of Blawg Review, a long-running weekly feature...

Blawg Review #271

Posted on July 07, 2010
Since July 5 is X-Day, this Blawg Review will reflect upon the Church of the SubGenius.TM If you are already celebrating X-Day, congratulations. If you were unaware that today is X-Day, most likely this information was once in your possession...

End of an Era? Another Crunch Berries Case Dismissed

Posted on July 07, 2010
When we last checked in on the Crunch Berries/Froot Loops line of cases, which allege that the marketing of these cereals leads people to believe they contain significant amounts of fruit, eight such cases had been filed and the plaintiffs'...

Blawg Review #271

Posted on July 05, 2010
Since July 5 is X-Day, this Blawg Review will reflect upon the Church of the SubGenius.TM If you are already celebrating X-Day, congratulations. If you were unaware that today is X-Day, most likely this information was once in your possession...

"Most-Sued Mascot in the Majors" Is Back in Court

Posted on July 03, 2010
"Grace Crass, of Wernersville, [Pennsylvania,] claims that she was at the [game] with her church group when the massive, green, bird-anteater hybrid climbed through the stands and onto her legs," said the report on June 30 about the latest tort...

Good Reason to Kill #8: The Vuvuzela

Posted on July 01, 2010
An American living in Germany may be charged with assault after allegedly threatening to kill his neighbors with an ax if they didn't stop blowing their vuvuzelas during televised World Cup matches. (This was before the U.S. was eliminated, so...

Good Reason to Kill #7: Disagreed With Your Macaroni Recipe

Posted on June 30, 2010
On June 6, in East Wenatchee, Oregon, a 17-year-old girl attacked her 21-year-old brother with a "knife-edged barbecue spatula" after the two argued over how to make macaroni and cheese. The girl told police that she was making the dish...

Comedian-Led Political Party Wins Big in Reykjavik

Posted on June 29, 2010
The best party in Reykjavik's local elections this year was the Best Party, a party made up largely of comedians and actors led by "Iceland's most famous comedian," Jon Gnarr. Gnarr's party won the largest single share of votes in...

From the Docket: Failed to Warn Escalator Was Not Moving

Posted on June 29, 2010
A possible candidate for (to use a legal term of art) the look-where-you're-going defense: Kim Kreis, et al. v. American Multi-Cinema Inc.; AMC Entertainment Inc., No. CGC-10-501102 (San Francisco Super. Ct. filed June 25, 2010). Trip and fall lawsuit...

Landlord Victorious in Peeps Trial

Posted on June 28, 2010
I somehow failed to notice that the Peeps eviction case had gone to trial in Boulder, Colorado, but I have now learned that the trial ended in a verdict for the landlord. As you may recall, Carol Burdick had alleged...

Fat Rapist Claims Confession Was Coerced by Junk-Food Offer

Posted on June 26, 2010
Big-bellied rapist Bruce Tuck, a flabby 275-pounder who was somewhat uncreatively nicknamed the "Big-Bellied Rapist" during a string of crimes he committed in Tennessee, has now argued in court papers that his confession was coerced because a detective offered him...

Bloggers, promote your law blog by nominating your blog for inclusion in USLaw.com's Law Blog Directory and RSS Reader. Benefits described.